Someon's Got Christma Spirit!

"I would like to thank Bath & Bodyworks for helping my dick to smell like an orange mango combination."

-Me

Well, I must say that nothing quite beats seeing our president receive the ultimate Iraqi insult, shoes thrown at him. What irritates me is how so many American people kiss his ass after 8 years of ruining America. It takes a foreigner to put things in the right perspective. Millions of shoes should have been thrown at Bush.

My mum went caroling today. That is all I will tell you even if the nursing home residents said her group did a good job.

Once again, I find myself in questions relating to Christmas gifts. What do I get Sara? I'm going the boring route because it's obvious that the economy has been hard on her. This means DVDs and a gag gift (sorta) all about someone I cannot stand. I'm in complete annoyance that she loves Tila Tequila, the Myspace whore. For one thing, she's incredibly vapid and in no way gorgeous. Angelina Jolie I can understand America's obsession with. Tila? No. She looks like something from another planet threw up on ours.

I'd rather be on a deserted island with MTV's Jesse Camp than Tila Tequila.

I've already got everything I've ever wanted. Shoes? More Air Jordan sneakers than I care to admit. Socks? A whole year's worth. According to Sara, I'm a girl inside. I take baths with smelly things from Bath & Bodyworks where my even my dog quesions my sexuality by sniffing me at a point that I smelled like black raspberries.

It's been a long weekend all due to the obscene traffic brought on by the Holidays. The mall is no longer possible after 10am. Best Buy is a place you have to fight for a parking spot. Borders? Oh, man! In all my time, I've never had to circle the lot for a spot. Let's just say that I wish fat nerds would move a little faster.

One thing I noticed at our Borders is that every one of The Dark Knight DVDs and Blu-Rays was sold. Every. Fucking. One. I've never seen a complete collection of movie sold before. All the Wall-E's, Narnias, Wanteds, and Sopranos were there. While it is nice to see such great taste in which a movie that questions what a hero is gets sold so well, it's gonna feel weird when pretty much every household will have a copy. Kind of reminds me of how I was so tired of Nintendo's Duck Hunt game because everyone had a copy. Fun but gets boring eventually.

Again, The Dark Knight is absolutely incredible to view. In fact, I would like to watch it again so I might buy Sara a copy for her DVD player since she has yet to upgrade to a Blu-Ray. 2 times in the movie theater is not enough to see Heath Ledger's Joker.

I now find it weird to continually smell raspberries.

We are due for a snowstorm this week! It's been a while where I had to dig us all out. No one is in such great shape when it comes to dealing with Mother Nature. But I, yes, I am. There is something romantic about the complete quiet outside in the dark of night as no one else has to balls to dig with a shovel. I'm sure my family finds me retarded every now and then.

What keeps me going is knowing that Sara's mom is pretty damn cool when it comes to Christmas. Unlike my mum, she goes all out with a Christmas tree, quiche, and presents. This house has not seen such things in years because it gets boring when it comes to cash. Real men eat quiche. Real men also enjoy hanging up shiny balls around a fake tree instead of hearing how it's too much work to do.

So, a day is finally over. Renewed my gym membership and ran my little tired heart out on the treadmill of doom. Loved every minute when I had the feeling the cute college girl behind me got to see my tiny little toned ass move to the groove. Gawd, I so need a fine sexual release underneath a large comfy bed at this time of year. Lugging balls this big and full of 'poison' is not the way to go. Happy twats all around.