Year In Review

"I can see Chicago from my house."

-Me

Well, this is my Year In Review entry. What I'm going to do about all this is to just add things throughout the week, clearly leading into next year. In other words, this is going to one mutha of an entry as I find more things to add each day. You have been warned and, hopefully, offended.

1). The best way to start out all this is by what you see around you. Never before have I seen something like the recession we are in. A mall nearby has closed its doors. People are having an impossible time finding jobs. Worked 25 years for a company? Means nothing as many more get layed off over people worrying over their own money. In other words, is it possible that Americans realize there are more important things than owning everything?

I think a lot of this goes along with watching Sara try and find employment. It was certainly a bitch to see her near giving up. It was in the car coming back that Sara told me she didn't know what she was going to do after being turned down yet again. Even though it's great that she's working at Macy's, there is still the inevitable due to retail's sluggish season ending. Many of my own friends now work less hours at their old jobs only to be forced into working part-time at another job.

What about my job? Been there just over a year, 1 year and 3 months, to be exact. I've had plenty of ups and downs in regards to how I am treated. Yeah, I've got muscles but they do wear the fuck down after hauling things weighing over 50 pounds day after day. Plus, I don't understand why managers bitching you out don't put down their fucking machine thingees to help. I can only do so much, fucker. Plus, why is it that certain employees get treated so much better than us lowly dock workers? Employee morale is a must.

2). Yeah, I supported Obama. In no way do I regret it, even if there are a few things he's done that annoy me. Serves me right. Obama did say that he was willing to work with all, instead of filtering out the bastards that continue to ruin this world. This so-called amazing pastor that has been invited to the Inauguration is just a small issue while the holding off of taxing the rich gets to me more. We are a nation in great distress. Dealing with the issues of allowing gays to marry can wait for now.

But why not? I'm impressed with a presidential hopeful displaying his feelings that gays should be allowed to marry. Tis' would be nice. Think of how the economy would be helped by catering! Gays love to exhibit taste, most likely more so than the typical wedding that tends to look more like white trash exhibit A these days. As much as I do enjoy seeing religious leaders' facial expressions when mentioning a pussy touching another pussy or two dicks finding their way into another male's mouth, it's time to allow gays to marry. Where a person puts their genitals is of no concern to you, reader.

Pray tell. Obama's going to have one hell of a time in the White House. Our current president has left an enormous mess to sort through. No matter what Obama does, there is going to be plenty blame placed his way. The first 100 days, or possibly more, may give him a bit of lee-away due being new and black. In my own view, no matter what Obama does, it will be far superior than what McCain could come up with.

3). Personally, I've grown to slow down in my need to blog. It's a weird thing, to sit here at a computer and feel like I am talking to myself. Seriously, that's how I view this thing. Whatever my mind is going over ends up here in my own little space I have allowed you to read. I've no problem offending you for I am a firm believer that that kind of thing awakens a reader out of his/her little safe spot. Plus, we all enjoy discussing the little weird things about sex. Penises are ridiculous looking. Vaginas? We all know they can wreck havoc with their vast amounts of smells.

Work kind of wears me down to the point that I'd rather do other things than sit here at a computer. With my deaf co-worker to bitch things out with, I'm less prone to outbursts. Ah, yes, being in a large cold truck tends to rock me to sleep. By 11pm, I'm almost as dead as a doornail these days.

That's not to say I don't enjoy blogs. There are a few I've been reading for years and years. Isn't that creepy? When I look back at it all, I realize that I've known some people over the computer for more than 5 years. When it reaches 10 years, I think it's done time we admit we're all married to each other. To think that it was just over 3 years that I was once offered a pair of dirty knickers by a woman that told me I am in need of a good spanking.

4). One thing I will not forget about this year is being told that Sara misses me all the time. Yes, little ol' me, the white boy with no ass, has been hinted at that I need to start thinking of moving to Indiana next year. I still remember that evening very well. For one thing, it was my birthday in an Italian restaurant that Sara had a slightly hard time telling me that I am missed when I leave the bed to go back home.

Obviously, this will be a first. I've never been told that after years of dating, it's time to take the next step. With Sara and I, it all started at her favorite burger restaurant, X-Men 2 in the DVD player, and sex. See? Sex on the first date does tend to keep some guys. So, stop fretting about that blowjob you gave to the guy you picked up on 2nd Street. He might actually come back for another one.

This is where I'm scared. Moving in is a big step. It's an even bigger step when two people have completely different viewpoints on how to keep an apartment/house. I'm neat. Sara is...well, it's like her closet throws up everyday. No matter how hard I try to keep my eyes closed upon entering her room, I just cannot understand how someone can allow large piles of dirty clothes to be all over a room. I've had this slight fantasy of hosting dinner parties in Sara's apartment, as her friends do. How is that possible when there are dirty panties and socks all over the place? It's even harder to feel sexual when the coughing and sneezing overcome me.

5). My car. Oh, lordy! What a great year to experience things go wrong on an interstate! Even better is the fact that I got driven home by a guy with only one hand. Remember Flipper? That was his nickname after having the fingers in one of his hands pulled out by a horse. You just cannot go wrong with a discussion of Flipper over dinner. It's almost like being an astronaut. While he/she might say, "But have you ever been to the moon," I would end up saying, "Yeah, but have you ever been driven home by a guy with only one hand?"

One of the scariest things is having a car break down on the interstate. Fuck! I'm not one to cry but I sure as hell got angry on that hot day driving home. Pulled over to the side and noticed that I only had battery power to get one phone call out. Lucky for me, I met Flipper, of course. I'm certainly not mad about how 30 minutes of being there meant no one else bothered to stop. How many times have you pulled up to a person in distress to help out?

There were other incidents where my car quit. This also brought about the answer as well. My dad changed the fuel type by allowing me to run on E-85. While it does work in the city, the interstate is a whole other matter. Things tend to overheat or the car reads a full tank of E-85 as being empty. Weird. Think of what I went through. 2 or 3 months to figure that all out.

This being a recession, my car went through another ordeal. It was broken into for the first time! Ah-ha! I popped my cherry when it comes to dealing with people that absolutely need your $1.75 of change that consists of nickels and pennies. That's all they got, along with the garage door opener whose code we had to change. Once things settled down, I do admit to a little bit of being freaked that someone had been in my car without my permission. No matter how fucked up the car, intrusion is not warranted.

6). The Dark Knight, what an amazing movie! As of December 29th, I have seen it around 8 times and it just keeps impressing me with how it all came together. Sure, we all hear about Heath Ledger's portrayal of The Joker. While I must say that I was thrilled that it was hype worthy of placing this man up for an Oscar, I must say that, by jolly, the darkness consumed me into a mist that I could not comprehend yet I allowed it to overtake me into its warm embrace. This is what Batman is about.

What people keep forgetting is that Batman is a man obsessed with some sort of psychologically implanted need to rid the world of evil and its ilk. He just does not fuck around. Period. The director, Christopher Nolan (geeks are now in love with this man), gave us a movie full of things that this comic book is famous for. The street fight scene, while there are a lot of good scenes, is something I continue to watch over and over. The Joker, a bit on the suicidal side, dares Batman to bend his rules of not killing no matter how evil the person is. Look at Batman's anger as he is forced to decide on this, even if it means crashing into the truck.

There was no funny sidekick, something that has irritated me to no avail. When it came to The Dark Knight, I truly felt like I was home to those stories I read as a kid. These weren't little kids' comics but more adult where decisions, no matter the outcome, just aren't easy. Sometimes, people just fucking die, man.

The Dark Knight went like this: The Joker was chaos to Batman's rigid goodness (even if he did bend the rules sometimes) and Two-Face represented chance. Nothing is as simple as this but these are the best descriptions you can get. What the Joker kept trying to do is get everyone to realize that society can create the very evil it tries to rid itself of. An old joke in comics is that when a person in costume shows up, another will appear as well. Plus, no one is absolutely perfect. No one.

2 other movies got to me, Wanted and Tropic Thunder. The latter is what I saw a couple days ago on Pay Per View. You take a group of spoiled actors, place them in the middle of an actual war without realizing it, and you create one hell of a great mess. You will not recognize Robert Downey Jr. in black-face for he is so in character. Wanted is just this big ass question about whether you are happy with your life. Hate it? Change it and find yourself in the process, especially if the 2nd best assassin looks like Angelina Jolie. Oh, how I loved it when she rose out of the recovery pool butt-naked! You know me. I love a woman's ass. Of course, there was that other scene that amused the fuck out of me, when Wesley smashed the keyboard into the face of the guy fucking his girlfriend. The keys broken off spell "Fuck You."

7). Walks with 5-Pound Phooey. Where would I be without my daily walks in the park with my little demon of mayhem? Hard to believe that this dog will stand her ground when it comes to telling everyone, be it big or small, that 5-Pound Phooey is boss. Everytime I take her to get my haircut, she has to chase the cats out of the bushes. People laugh when something so tiny goes straight up to their large dogs' faces to do some sort of doggy cussing. 5-Pound Phooey's not mean, just really, really bossy.

The funny thing is that, as of today, I am not high on 5-Pound Phooey's list. She does not like combings. This is something she needs so I am not backing down on getting rid of those tangles that make her look a bit like a dog that's spent some time starting fights in the streets over who pissed on her p-mail messages. Have comb? 5-Pound Phooey all gone.

8). Pregnancy tests. What is it with you girls and your periods!?! It's weird how stress can take them away. It's even weirder how if a bunch of girls live together all their periods will sync up. Can't you just will away crotch bleeding?

All I can say about pregnancy tests is that it's just not fun to sit on the bathroom floor while Sara pees on a stick. Sure, there are those that get sexual thrills watching women pee but not I. I know it doesn't just appear as a result of magic, unlike some guys. A bathroom's tiles just don't bring about the need for sex even if her panties are down.

There is one amusement I do confess to. I've always paid attention to how girls sit when peeing because these positions come in a variety. The cutest has to be knees together but feet wide apart while the weirdest has to be sitting straight up with knees and feet together. Kristan, my virginity taker, would always just have her legs and feet wide apart. Jen was the most hilarious because late nights meant zombie-like mornings. Her feet and knees were tightly together but her head was most often in her lap. Some of you piss so fucking loud!

Yes, it's scary when faced with wondering why a period has gone AWOL. I don't want kids and neither does Sara. We're the ones that sit in restaurants wishing all the noisy kids would just fucking disappear. You'd think that it's the bad parenting that's done it for us. No, we just don't like kids. Every once in a while, I do get curious as to what kind of child my sperm can create. It's strictly fantasy because I think more along the lines of superhuman geniuses with the strength of 10 men. The girls would all be ninjas.

Anyway, the results were that we aren't pregnant. There will be no shouting, "This is all your fault!" at my dick.

9). The drive to Chicago was quite scary. Ever driven to this city? Well, I found myself being forced to drive there on April 9th all because Sara wanted to meet one of her favorite authors, Christopher Rice. After filling up at a diner, I was so nervous about hitting that long interstate into a large city that's as confusing as being forced to choose between Jaws and Aliens with only 2.5 hours of viewing time. Do I go for the 'bigger boat' or 'grinnin' and droppin' that linen?'

I've a huge fear of driving in a big city. Sure, I've been to Chicago a few times, mostly in the downtown area where the Water Tower is. Only, this was where someone else was driving. Those long traffic jams and people driving insane through large tunnels! That was me! There were 7 lanes that led into a dark tunnel and all Sara and I had was a trusty sidekick G.P.S. to get us there. Ask Sara. I was fucking freaked out but got us there, 3 tollroads later.

Of course, the Barnes & Noble that Christopher Rice appeared at was enormous! This was my kind of place, located within a very wealthy area where Armani and Lacoste set up shop. I was in love! The bookstore itself had more books than I'm used to so I pretty much stuck with scanning through the photography section where I found an $80 book on the Perelli Calender made famous for its use of beautiful supermodels barely dressed or just naked. Told you I love ass.

Sara was extremely happy about meeting Christopher Rice, a man with a large gay following. I'm not saying that in the lightest sense because you are talking to a guy with no gaydar. Here I was faced with alarms all around me. There were so many gay guys that I just had to smile at their drooling over an author considered hot by their standards, skinny with a face that's quite peculiar. Me, I talked two guys in front of Sara and I into taking a picture of her with Christopher Rice. I've no problem with talking to gays. In fact, I had a blast discussing something that I cannot remember just now.

Whatever. The whole point is that April 9th was one very scary day but well-spent. I'm scared of Chicago but its more along the lines of respect. My family loves the movie, The Blues Brothers, because they know that place well. I'm just catching up.

10). There has got to be something not so honorable about a guy that is proud of his crotch smelling like raspberries or orange mango or amber. Yes, I changed things around when I discovered the glories in feminine bath products. I'm a total bath guy by heart thanks to the need to soak after running my body through the most serious of workouts. There isn't a problem with me going all girly by laying in a bath for hours with the latest tabloid as candles provide my only light.

If you don't remember the incident, this all started when Sara came to stay here for her birthday. When she saw what was used as bubbles, I was ordered to change things around immediately. I'm a guy so I tend to follow what I'm used to, dishwashing detergent. Seriously, I never knew why my skin itched so bad after a bath til Sara pointed things out.

The mall! We went to a few places where I smelled so many great smells. While many guys would look away in disgust, I fell in love with Bath & Bodyworks. Give me lime! Give me raspberries! Just why do I have to be obsessed with the greatest of smells, fruits? People either laugh or look at me with their jaws dropped when I admit to sniffing Strawberry Shortcake's panties. In my defense, I was young, in love with strawberries, and in need of a legal high.

Sara always laughs at how their is a new smell on my cock. One day it could be Japanese blossoms. The next? It's really more of a mystery because I have over 25 different scents in my bathroom. While Sara doesn't like the smell of amber, I have a tendency to be mess with her by having my balls seem like they were dipped in it.

11). Ah, the inevitable threesome question that came up in an Italian restaurant, the same one I was asked to think about moving to Indiana. Sara once wrote in her blog that she'd get a slight tickle over watching my cock go into another girl. In other words, she'd be the third person observer that gets to view all my movements instead of having to shout at the ceiling as I pound her pussy.

First of all, I am completely monogamous. Some might see it as an error, particularly the ones that continue to hit on me. Those Bath & Bodyworks girls seem to smile a bit more knowing my cock is gonna smell really, really good. It's just that there is a slight scientist in me that would like to do some exploring. I've been with Sara for almost 4 years so my penis has not been in another girl for a long time. Add that to the fact that I enjoy scents. Voila! I'd like to explore two pussies at the same time just to compare the feel, scents, and enjoyment of it all. Trust me. If I'm in you, I'm going to see just how good you feel in there.

Sara laughed when I had a girl in mind. Mind you, I'm quite picky and take Sara into account on all this. Most of my female friends are absolutely gorgeous (a newscenter's anchor and a Puerto Rican I talked to today will give you an idea) but aren't as crazy as me. One that would be absolutely into it is now married. That's a total no-no with me. I'd never take the chance on wrecking a marriage even if the issue seemed impossible. What I wanted was someone that could get along with Sara as well.

One person I had in mind seemed to constantly go through bad days. Like Sara, I had this weird energetic want to please her while Sara looked on. I hate seeing people worn the fuck out by society's stupidity and would just want her to lay back for major fucking. Let me do the work by slowly sliding in to help forget about a nasty boss. My inner scientist would like to have its way by pleasing both pussies back and forth by feeling how wet, the tightness, and where her most sensitive spot is. I know Sara's, deep thrusting always gets it done.

From the way I see a threesome, it's just fun. The body was made for sin. There is a deep love of pussy when it comes to me. Its that smell, the feel, and seeing my cock's skin completely covered in wetness that helps make a day much better. This has to be under consideration by both and, yes, I'd love to see Sara eat pussy. I'd be down there as well after I've pumped myself silly

But the best thing about a threesome and a major reason for who I choose is what to do afterwards. You talk! Gawd, why just get up and leave!?! You need someone you can talk about music and movies with. There is a silly side wanting to be let out all while knowing that this is not an everyday event. Sometimes a girl just needs her pussy tamed and the girlfriend realizes this. For now, this is just a fantasy that came about when Ron Jeremy was surprised with around 15 naked girls in a room. After licking 3 or 4, he had to get his dick out or he'd burst. Why do I use Ron as an example? He actually cared about pleasing each girl.

Alright, I will be leaving tomorrow for Indiana but know this is not done. I've to do a few more things that need to be added to all this. Where oh where do I go when it comes to the enjoyment of having the Playboy Channel? I've learned so much from their sex news segments, foreign and domestic fetishes. I even have to edit some things in this enormous entry so stay tuned for me when I get back. New Year's Eve always brings announcements from within large groups like ours.

So, I will be back to place more things as well as add to what I already have. Stay tuned as I have yet to get to the most exciting things of all.........sex! Playboy Channel! Sarah Palin! Porn! My obsession with peppermint ice cream!