Playboy, Aliens, And Burn Notice

"Sometimes, you just need a goddamn hug."

-Me

We all have days like this. It could be that you feel as if no one notices you. Everything that could go wrong just did. The heat is annoying and makes everyone think it's you that smells like ass. You're itchy all over due to some allergic reaction. Or maybe, just maybe you you're like my dog, all out of gas and in need of a hug.

Nothing like people watching you as a small dog climbs into your lap as you sit on someone else's lawn. 5-Pound Phooey was wiped out. It could be the heat that got to her or maybe complete boredom. When faced with the fact that there was no cat to chase or dog to bark at, a walk can get pretty boring. It doesn't help when a pile of poop is considered a 'threatening message' thanks to the manner it was left. Sometimes, I really hate it how dogs use the parks as a chat room.

I'm still here. Just been a little busy with discovering things. Rethinking or self-improvements can be masturbation material. I'm always on the lookout to work myself into some sort of steam. Nonetheless, I got to thinking during my walk that I want to lower the thickness in my chest muscles. I mean, it is nice that people stare, girls and guys, when it comes to all that hard work put on my pectoralis major and minor. However, I want 'the boys' slimmed down a bit so I can wear clothes without Sara mimicking me as I walk. She tends to do that.

New push-ups are key. Less bench-pressing. You'll find me with 2 22.5 lb. dumbbells turned upwards so I can push-up in between them. It's hard. It's somewhat painful. But, dammit, I enjoy going through periods of self-improvements. Not many people do these kinds of chest exercises because they are just that, damned enough to send you through a tizzy. It took me 3 days to fully recover from Wednesday's session so that's what I want.

More pain. It helps you feel alive when other parts of your life feel dead.

Other than that self-improving that is masturbating material, I've fallen in love with Burn Notice. Why oh why this show is only slightly well-known I will never know. You've got it all. A mixture of Mr. And Mrs. Smith (and we all know how I am obsessed with THAT movie), a smart character that is cold as ice, a trigger happy girlfriend with a six-pack and attitude, Miami, gorgeous women, and stories that draw you in where you beg for more. I'm begging so much! I've not been addicted to a show like this since Veronica Mars. Sure, Battlestar Galactica is nice but that didn't always leave me dying to see what mess Michael Weston is into next. How can it be that I'd enjoy having a girlfriend buying weapons on the black market in a stolen BMW all in the pursuit of goodness in her heart?

Plus, I hacked into the satellite and found out I get the Playboy Channel! Well, that and every pornographic channel that would make several people not able to leave the room. Lucky me. There was no reaching for the zipper. I'm not quite like that, as fascinating as pussy is.

The Playboy Channel is so much fun. While the evening hours of 2-6 hours of porno movies don't get to me, the reality shows and news from the world of Playboy are fun. What more can I want? I've got personalities that draw me in all while various scenes of ass, tits, and bush are on display but not in a way that demeans. In other words, classy is the key word here. There are times I enjoy a little graphic gyno views but.........

To give you an idea, Playboy is going to have a show where one of my favorite photography books' author is going show how he takes pictures of what else.........happy naked girls! You can probably buy it on Amazon or somewhere. The point is that we're talking good old fashioned fun nudity. All the women are smiling as they take their clothes off in their own homes or apartments. If they're more comfortable with the photographer being naked, too, he'll drop it all. I'm just tired of all the pouting because nudity is supposed to be fun. Remember, I posed for Sara's painting. Yes, it was weird to sit there for 5 hours where my balls lay there on the couch's cushion yet I still smiled.

But you want to know about the naughty stuff, too? I've never seen grown men wearing baby bonnets or diapers til now. I've never thought of eating a girl's ass/pussy while she makes scrambled eggs til now. I've never ordered a girl to hold my dick while I pee and talk on the phone. The sad part is that I was more interested in eating those scrambled eggs because I love eggs.

The reality shows on Playboy TV look fun. Various couples send in their homemade amateur tapes. Nice. But it's the bitchiness found in the documentaries on the porn company Vivid's filming in Porn Valley. Some girls don't want to work with other girls. There is some sensitivity or someone's snatch smells awful. All is better when things work themselves out as a girl eats out another girl by bending her over all of a sudden. The funny part was the guy that just walks into Vivid's office, stares at the receptionist, and hopes she'll just get him a part in a porn movie. Nice to see that psychos continue to exist and that women continue to have to deal with them. According to the lady heading that part of the office, they try to shoo crazy people off by insisting they drop their pants and get hard right there.

For the life of me, I cannot understand a word on Playboy Latin TV. Those Mexicans have a different taste in sexuality that I've yet to get. At least the girls aren't completely bare down there like the boring blonds are.

So, I must be off. More Playboy TV (Sara wishes to watch) and Burn Notice. I'll be gone next weekend to tell Sara all about what I've seen, the good and the dirty. According to porn, aliens do have penises attached to their bodies and, yes, they help in exploring the female's most sensitive cavities. Oh, and they fuck hard! UFOs can bring in all the best channels when it comes to those long space rides. I'd just hope for a blowjob while eating scrambled eggs. I've got simple fantasies. Happy twats all around.