Obama Knows Tits

"You wanna know what would cause me to need a moment to pause? A woman with gigantic fake tits telling me to be honest with her. Just what the fuck is she selling?"

-Me

"Obama should be considered the same as Britney Spears? Sounds like a certain 72-year-old is jealous of someone that is looking mighty presidentially sexy. Those old-timers can sure bring out the best quotes."

-Me (Once I heard McCain said that about Obama)

Hi, Just came around here on something else. I'm probably one of the few individuals that still love Huey Lewis And the News. Do you know those days? Ah, when MTV announces a new video by them, it was huge. "Doing It All For My Baby" was the last one I remember from those great 80's. Why do so many people say they try to forget them?

See, that's pretty much it for me on a H-O-T Thursday. I'm sitting here looking up lyrics to 'Heart And Soul' and trying to figure out why I am the perfect target for a little brown boy on a bike. You'd think that my size would warrant an easy avoidance but....no. Inches from crashing into me while I walked 5-Pound Phooey (off to my left sniffing things). The little boy's guide/escort or whatever was a young brown woman that would not stop staring at me. Yes, I'm shirtless (almost spelled 'shitless' instead) but in no mood to be flirted with. If it's not this young girl, it's the older parents that stared at me on the park bench the day before. Brown women must really go for the guys that look like they can be dominated by. Or maybe just a guy that smells better than what they've got. I pretty much stunk in the park so it must be the looks.

We've got Muslims. You've got annoying too talkative co-workers while I've got smelly people that stink so bad before work even begins. Think about it. I spent a great deal explaining to you about the heat I must deal with at work. Think how bad it gets for those that don't believe in smelling good. My deaf co-worker kept using sign language to tell me from across the area that the Muslims smell like shit. Lovely.

Found a debate between teens on a forum. Found myself wondering the same thing. Why don't more black women work out? There's hardly any in my gym. Guys, yes. Women? No. When we do get the occasional black woman, it's mainly the biggest ass you've ever seen type. Booty claps? More than likely. With an ass that big, how the hell does a boyfriend find the hole to put his dick in? Does he just guess?

Gonna leave for Indiana on Friday. In case you don't keep up with current events on my life, the last time I came home on the interstate brought back some real horror. No one wants to ever have their car quit on them in such a situation. Well, I got to experience it and learned to love a 6-fingered man.

So, how would you react to learning that you're stuck on an interstate? My first reaction? Total panic for a few minutes but then I learned to relax and enjoy the scariness. It tends to bring about adrenaline within me that I cannot describe. My only annoyance was with the loudness brought by the speeding trucks going by constantly. Yeah, it's loud and hard to hope my parents heard me on the cell phone. Why oh why did I get into the situation where even my phone was close to death's door? Two calls out and it was total darkness.

It's weird how I felt okay with getting out of my car and sitting on the trunk. Just watch the cars go by. You don't realize how fast 80 miles per hour is until you've watched the interstate close up without moving. One little slip and I aint got no head.

Keep in mind, it was extremely hot that day. Sitting in the car would have been far worse. Wish I could have saved that batch of cookies that rode shotgun with me on my way home.

No one stopped. I was fine with that because I tend to drive by the occasional stranded individual at times without stopping. With everyone needing a cell phone, it's in my world to be okay with it. They'll call. They'll find a way. No more hitchhiking with total strangers. Though, I still do not recommend picking up someone holding an axe and standing next to a case of beer without a stitch on. Ignore your boyfriend if he insists you stop so you can share the beer.

That's why I don't travel with an axe BUT I do have a fancy little light that gives off the Bat Signal. I'm Batman, dammit! But even he needs some help, sometimes.

So, the big question is whether I will get to Sara's or have to make that dreaded call that I'm fucked and no one will pick me up because I look like a stressed out cubicle worker with no future for sentimental poetry.

Sara sent me a link to this story that's been bugging me a little. Keira Knightley is upset over a studio's wanting to change various pictures of her by adding tits, or the look of actual cleavage. If that's the case, why didn't they hire an actress with such mountains of grandeur? Keira's unbelievably gorgeous and known for not having tits. Now, accept her for who she is. Not every girl out there has more than a man's handful. Not all of us males want women to have such things. I'm all for the tiny titties, more than a mosquito bite, but tiny.

I've only dated one girl with major tits yet had no idea as to what to do with them during sex. There would be a lot of males that would have enjoyed playing with these things but it felt so foreign for me to lust after them. Completely fine with a tit job and 'motorboatin'' but nothing in the way of hand play.

So, I hope y'all stand up and cheer on Keira in her fight to end this assumption that all women need massive cleavage to be considered worthy of our attention. Better yet, let's add some intelligence to McCain where he should stick to the facts of life and not about the sexiness of Obama. It's always the ugly ones that get jealous of those that walk around like their dicks have just been greased by a woman's maidenhead. Happy twats all around.