"I'm a really easy person to bribe. All it takes is scrambled eggs and hash browns and I'm yo' bitch."
-Me
-Me
Ah, summer. It's the time of year where pawn shops are busy with black people popping open their trunks to sell the loot from their latest burglaries or 'friends' since it's gettin' so hard to afford all those gas prices. It was today that I watched the pawn shop across the street as I waited for the comic shop to open. I'm serious in saying that everyone dropping stuff off was black. It wasn't completely full of stereotypes because not all the cars had giant rims. Not everything being dropped off was stereo equipment. It's just that I know there have been a mass of burglaries up north and pawn shops have been busier every since the gas prices went up.
Don't you dare call me a racist. Car after car, it was the same ol' thing. I get a kick out of people telling me that I live in a world that needs to stop saying things about what I see. Really? I'm a realist and just about every fucking event in the newspaper's police blotter has the same damn thing: Black male between the ages of 15-35. Fuck off.
Oh, and this bitching about gas prices is wearing thin. I can understand if you are forced to travel due to work. What I don't understand is people that drive around aimlessly. You know the type. They like to show off their cars or pile the kids up in the SUV to go for ice cream. They, then, stand outside to complain with others that are also wearing a recently purchased Ralph Lauren polo short-sleeved top.
Why don't people walk? When I go see Sara, we walk a pretty good distance to get ice cream (not a huge portion, mind you) and look over books at Borders. It's fun in this type of weather, sunny and quite warm but we walk more at night due to the coolness. Sara feels safe with me, seeing as people constantly comment on my arms/chest/or my super sexy bird legs. It's just that we don't get this feeling that we must drive to places all the time nor do we watch TV excessively like the average American. Personally, I'd rather read a book, have sex, talk, go for a walk, sit back on the porch, run with 5-Pound Phooey, work out, drink lemonade, draw, go see a baseball game, or anything that doesn't involve watching TV for too many hours.
And Americans are called pigs for a reason. For some reason, we MUST shop to keep up with Paris Hilton. We must get the latest DVD or the second version with better special features. We must get our bellies filled with fattening food and enjoy a long smoke afterwards. We must watch reality TV shows til bedtime and then ask why we are fat. We must drive to a destination that is only 2 blocks. We must fight for the right to smoke in bars and pollute the streets with cigarette butts. We must hold large meetings in quads about how great it would be to inhale weed only to leave the area polluted with litter. We must complain about not having any money after spending it all on wasteful things because the stores had sales. We must wait 30 minutes in line at Starbucks for a latte after telling the kids to hurry their lazy asses up (In fact, they're still in the car) because Mommy needs her expensive coffee fix that will have the kids dropped off far too early for school. We must complain about the costs of raising kids after the 4th because condoms are just too expensive.
Well, I'm part British and I kind of foresaw the gas prices going up. What did I do? Stocked up like a motherfucker so I don't have to deal with driving so much. Socks? Got 162 pairs and will no longer need any for............forever! Underwear? Nearly 100 pairs of Calvins. DVDs? I'm a rental store just waiting to open but I don't buy much anymore. Reality TV show? Don't watch 'em anymore. The only show I watch and cannot miss is Veronica Mars and the occasional HBO/Showtime series. Mind you, none of these involves obese black women that cannot figure out how to behave in a department store. Life is grand when you don't feel any sort of need to shop. I love my t-shirts and shorts and don't feel any sort of need to update my wardrobe.
Yes, I can be called a hypocrite for owning so much but why? I loan my DVDs to those that want them. I don't need clothes for a long, long time. Why do people need 30 pairs of jeans? I've always had 4 at the most. The local thrift store can help if you just gotta have something to buy. Socks, by the way, I go through fast since I tend to wear them around the house and chase dogs up and down the hall for fun. Underwear? Sara rips them off me and she owes me 2 pairs..........still.
Anyway, the point is that I got a kick out of an editorial cartoon about someone bitching the gas prices. He talked about the expense of various things and ends with the fact that he needs to go to the mall to get $300 worth of clothes. Pretty much sums up the typical American.
My only complaint is labeled more towards myself. What I hate is having to live with allergies up the wazoo. My waking up is of me feeling like I'm wasted. You'd think after sleeping 8 hours that I'd feel refreshed. Nope, I get through my summer days feeling worn down and only feel alive during the early evenings. Sneezing? Lots. Hearing? Clogged up ears.
I am getting used to the sweaty shirts. My coming back from the gym at this time of year is best described as drenched. You'd have to peel things off of me since my gym has no air conditioning. We're old school and leave more wet spots than a Jenna Jameson porn flick. It's just not funny when large hairy men leave a trail of sweat as they walk by. You'd swear that you saw dolphins calling you out for a swim with them.
So, I'm outta here. It looks like I'm going to Sara's to spend the Memorial Day Weekend with her and the parents. There's a cabin, a boat, and a canoe. This is my first time so it'll be interesting to wake up and find Sara's mom in the kitchen to talk to after dealing with the typical morning wood. By the way, I have a slight fear of fish so that's gonna be interesting since Sara likes to bring that up. Happy twats all around.
Don't you dare call me a racist. Car after car, it was the same ol' thing. I get a kick out of people telling me that I live in a world that needs to stop saying things about what I see. Really? I'm a realist and just about every fucking event in the newspaper's police blotter has the same damn thing: Black male between the ages of 15-35. Fuck off.
Oh, and this bitching about gas prices is wearing thin. I can understand if you are forced to travel due to work. What I don't understand is people that drive around aimlessly. You know the type. They like to show off their cars or pile the kids up in the SUV to go for ice cream. They, then, stand outside to complain with others that are also wearing a recently purchased Ralph Lauren polo short-sleeved top.
Why don't people walk? When I go see Sara, we walk a pretty good distance to get ice cream (not a huge portion, mind you) and look over books at Borders. It's fun in this type of weather, sunny and quite warm but we walk more at night due to the coolness. Sara feels safe with me, seeing as people constantly comment on my arms/chest/or my super sexy bird legs. It's just that we don't get this feeling that we must drive to places all the time nor do we watch TV excessively like the average American. Personally, I'd rather read a book, have sex, talk, go for a walk, sit back on the porch, run with 5-Pound Phooey, work out, drink lemonade, draw, go see a baseball game, or anything that doesn't involve watching TV for too many hours.
And Americans are called pigs for a reason. For some reason, we MUST shop to keep up with Paris Hilton. We must get the latest DVD or the second version with better special features. We must get our bellies filled with fattening food and enjoy a long smoke afterwards. We must watch reality TV shows til bedtime and then ask why we are fat. We must drive to a destination that is only 2 blocks. We must fight for the right to smoke in bars and pollute the streets with cigarette butts. We must hold large meetings in quads about how great it would be to inhale weed only to leave the area polluted with litter. We must complain about not having any money after spending it all on wasteful things because the stores had sales. We must wait 30 minutes in line at Starbucks for a latte after telling the kids to hurry their lazy asses up (In fact, they're still in the car) because Mommy needs her expensive coffee fix that will have the kids dropped off far too early for school. We must complain about the costs of raising kids after the 4th because condoms are just too expensive.
Well, I'm part British and I kind of foresaw the gas prices going up. What did I do? Stocked up like a motherfucker so I don't have to deal with driving so much. Socks? Got 162 pairs and will no longer need any for............forever! Underwear? Nearly 100 pairs of Calvins. DVDs? I'm a rental store just waiting to open but I don't buy much anymore. Reality TV show? Don't watch 'em anymore. The only show I watch and cannot miss is Veronica Mars and the occasional HBO/Showtime series. Mind you, none of these involves obese black women that cannot figure out how to behave in a department store. Life is grand when you don't feel any sort of need to shop. I love my t-shirts and shorts and don't feel any sort of need to update my wardrobe.
Yes, I can be called a hypocrite for owning so much but why? I loan my DVDs to those that want them. I don't need clothes for a long, long time. Why do people need 30 pairs of jeans? I've always had 4 at the most. The local thrift store can help if you just gotta have something to buy. Socks, by the way, I go through fast since I tend to wear them around the house and chase dogs up and down the hall for fun. Underwear? Sara rips them off me and she owes me 2 pairs..........still.
Anyway, the point is that I got a kick out of an editorial cartoon about someone bitching the gas prices. He talked about the expense of various things and ends with the fact that he needs to go to the mall to get $300 worth of clothes. Pretty much sums up the typical American.
My only complaint is labeled more towards myself. What I hate is having to live with allergies up the wazoo. My waking up is of me feeling like I'm wasted. You'd think after sleeping 8 hours that I'd feel refreshed. Nope, I get through my summer days feeling worn down and only feel alive during the early evenings. Sneezing? Lots. Hearing? Clogged up ears.
I am getting used to the sweaty shirts. My coming back from the gym at this time of year is best described as drenched. You'd have to peel things off of me since my gym has no air conditioning. We're old school and leave more wet spots than a Jenna Jameson porn flick. It's just not funny when large hairy men leave a trail of sweat as they walk by. You'd swear that you saw dolphins calling you out for a swim with them.
So, I'm outta here. It looks like I'm going to Sara's to spend the Memorial Day Weekend with her and the parents. There's a cabin, a boat, and a canoe. This is my first time so it'll be interesting to wake up and find Sara's mom in the kitchen to talk to after dealing with the typical morning wood. By the way, I have a slight fear of fish so that's gonna be interesting since Sara likes to bring that up. Happy twats all around.
3 comments:
You remind me of the new Linkin Park video, lol.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8sgycukafqQ
Not Mike, not Chester...you're more of a Brendan Fraser type.
Saw the new Garbage video. It's okay. It might have to grow on me, as so much of their new stuff eventually did.
I don't own a TV. I don't own a car. I generally buy locally grown, organic food. I walk to the ice cream parlor which serves organic ice cream made with cream from a local dairy and local/organic products. I walk the dog on the mountain, in the water district, and while we peruse Amazon.com for books from time to time, we buy them from a small local bookseller (because we appreciate having an independent bookseller in our town and choose to support the business, even when it's a little more pricey.) When I have to go into the City for work, I ride my bike (rain or shine) ten miles to the ferry building (twenty miles round trip) and take the ferry there and back. Most of the crime in my community is probably white collar and you're not going to see it written up in the crime watch section of the newspaper. But one of my partner's old clients (white male, 15-35) is on house arrest for embezzling/misappropriating over a million dollars from investors - my guess is that that form of burglary surpasses the damage done by a month of Sundays worth of petty crime pawn shop deals - and has more deep and lasting devastation to people's lives and retirements, etc. You can see what you see, but it's often just part of the story. Tally up the sum total from your boys in line at the pawn shop and put it against Enron or the S&L scandal and let's weight crime by race by that scale and see who comes up smelling. I'm a white girl who doesn't suffer much white guilt by I'm also not snow blind. Sometimes I like to dump $300 on new clothes, but shopping malls make me physically nauseous. Oddly, however, I could spend an entire afternoon combing through the aisles of CostCo and be fascinated, and probably walk out with only a case of sparkling water - but I'm amazing at the sheer volume of product. Ed reads to me as often as I'll let him, but lately I've been very tired and then I opt for an evening of Netflix. I don't pretend DVDs are all that different from TV with the major exception of the bombardment of commercials that accompany television. I love Survivor and I'll watch it through the computer or through iTunes. In the world of competing to be greener, better, lefter, realer, I probably don't win any ranking places. I invite my neighbors on walks with me and sometimes they begin appreciating nature. I invite them on bike rides and sometimes they really enjoy it and start talking about wanting to buy a bike. One began riding his bike to the ferry building for his daily commute. Another, who was afraid to walk on the mountain by himself, after some encouraging, now hikes near daily. I have found that it helps more to encourage and make easy the changes we would like to see in the world. Once they're experienced as rewarding and fun, mostly folks want to embrace personal change that makes them feel better. -Zu
Post a Comment