"He's a one-stop shop
makes the panties drop.
He's a sweet-talkin'
sugar coated candyman."
-"Candyman" by Christina Aguilera
makes the panties drop.
He's a sweet-talkin'
sugar coated candyman."
-"Candyman" by Christina Aguilera
Today, I was a sex object. Oh, the horror of being treated as if I my veins run with semen and my thoughts only center on having it purge out of me in volcanic eruptions! Then again, Sara says I'm cute so the girls can't help it. Go figure.
What happened was on a complete whim of fancy. Sara needed to go pick up her last check in a town 1.5 hours away. Of course, a guy should go along as company and escort due to this being an unknown town. Why not? Adventures happen when you least expect it. My best way of explaining this is to tell you that a hotdog got escorted with us.
So, here we were on a small trip, Sara and I with a hotdog. Since pretty much all of Indiana is new to me, I got to see new towns and various forms of bad driving. Never mind the fact that Sara almost hit a white van.
What would you do if you set foot in Willy Wonka's candy shop? While this little leisurely stroll was more to satisfy our need to set foot in a town 1.5 hours away, it ended up being a very smart shopping experience. The first thing I notice is this large tube running way up the ceiling. No, it wasn't white but dark brown thanks to large amounts of chocolate constantly coming down. Oh....my......gawd. This place will solve all women's PMS needs like a mean motherfucker! I'm not joking. While various women of all sizes could find themselves standing on ladders to lick a large pipe, the boys could enhance their sugar needs with so many different types of sweets. I wouldn't be surprised if the place has to deal with an obese toddler (or woman) not able to get out the door thanks to finding heaven.
I've seen these types of candy selling places in movies. Kids would place their mouths underneath machines' openings and let various things pour in. This would be close that since they care about hygiene and wanting to avoid tongue smudges during orgasmic moans. As much as I'd love to say these types of stores are great, they are a part of the problem when it comes to chunky kids coming out extremely fat. Imagine having someone pour M&M's down your throat whenever you want. It's close to that.
What made it amusing is this. If you avoid how funny it was to hear the various ladies groan when I tell them I can no longer eat chocolate (the horrors!), Sara and I couldn't believe how much I was flirted with throughout the time in this candy shop. The girls, and we are talking about some very beautiful ones, wouldn't leave me alone. As soon as Sara was off paying for something for her dad, I was surrounded by 3 very pretty girls wanting to know more about where I live, etc. It's weird and flattering.
While Sara used to hate this, the large amount of girls flirting with me has become something she's used to. I have to be taken out of shops, malls, stores, and restaurants to be kissed by her. I doubt it's a fear of losing me to some strange girl that has made it known that her panties have various pieces of fruit on them. Due to my strong nose, yes, I can smell pussy very easily. Blue eyes get a girl wet.
But I benefit in odd ways. With Sara now amused by girls' desire to flirt with me, I am told that I am to be fucked as soon as we get back to her apartment. A girl just cannot let a guy go home without spilling his desires all over the place, now can she? 30 minutes of the bed going all over the place and some hair pulling, the boy's balls are emptied. You know a girl has been satisfied when she's laying there with a large smirk and insists on placing her wet panties into the worn out boy's cargo shorts' pocket. I'm a sex object or whore for candy lovers everywhere.
So, I'm outta here as I've had to accept many doggie kisses from a 4-legged critter that missed me a bit too much. 5-Pound Phooey can't wait to deal with her public, poodles and schnauzers, as we torment them with all sorts of bad barks. I'm a whore and she's at war with the neighborhood. Happy twats all around.
What happened was on a complete whim of fancy. Sara needed to go pick up her last check in a town 1.5 hours away. Of course, a guy should go along as company and escort due to this being an unknown town. Why not? Adventures happen when you least expect it. My best way of explaining this is to tell you that a hotdog got escorted with us.
So, here we were on a small trip, Sara and I with a hotdog. Since pretty much all of Indiana is new to me, I got to see new towns and various forms of bad driving. Never mind the fact that Sara almost hit a white van.
What would you do if you set foot in Willy Wonka's candy shop? While this little leisurely stroll was more to satisfy our need to set foot in a town 1.5 hours away, it ended up being a very smart shopping experience. The first thing I notice is this large tube running way up the ceiling. No, it wasn't white but dark brown thanks to large amounts of chocolate constantly coming down. Oh....my......gawd. This place will solve all women's PMS needs like a mean motherfucker! I'm not joking. While various women of all sizes could find themselves standing on ladders to lick a large pipe, the boys could enhance their sugar needs with so many different types of sweets. I wouldn't be surprised if the place has to deal with an obese toddler (or woman) not able to get out the door thanks to finding heaven.
I've seen these types of candy selling places in movies. Kids would place their mouths underneath machines' openings and let various things pour in. This would be close that since they care about hygiene and wanting to avoid tongue smudges during orgasmic moans. As much as I'd love to say these types of stores are great, they are a part of the problem when it comes to chunky kids coming out extremely fat. Imagine having someone pour M&M's down your throat whenever you want. It's close to that.
What made it amusing is this. If you avoid how funny it was to hear the various ladies groan when I tell them I can no longer eat chocolate (the horrors!), Sara and I couldn't believe how much I was flirted with throughout the time in this candy shop. The girls, and we are talking about some very beautiful ones, wouldn't leave me alone. As soon as Sara was off paying for something for her dad, I was surrounded by 3 very pretty girls wanting to know more about where I live, etc. It's weird and flattering.
While Sara used to hate this, the large amount of girls flirting with me has become something she's used to. I have to be taken out of shops, malls, stores, and restaurants to be kissed by her. I doubt it's a fear of losing me to some strange girl that has made it known that her panties have various pieces of fruit on them. Due to my strong nose, yes, I can smell pussy very easily. Blue eyes get a girl wet.
But I benefit in odd ways. With Sara now amused by girls' desire to flirt with me, I am told that I am to be fucked as soon as we get back to her apartment. A girl just cannot let a guy go home without spilling his desires all over the place, now can she? 30 minutes of the bed going all over the place and some hair pulling, the boy's balls are emptied. You know a girl has been satisfied when she's laying there with a large smirk and insists on placing her wet panties into the worn out boy's cargo shorts' pocket. I'm a sex object or whore for candy lovers everywhere.
So, I'm outta here as I've had to accept many doggie kisses from a 4-legged critter that missed me a bit too much. 5-Pound Phooey can't wait to deal with her public, poodles and schnauzers, as we torment them with all sorts of bad barks. I'm a whore and she's at war with the neighborhood. Happy twats all around.
No comments:
Post a Comment