It's Gotta Be the Muscles

"You're mine."

-Sara

Do you ever have those weird moments where you think that a positive thing cannot actually be possible? The above statement came when Sara and I were walking around Target. I'm not sure what the main reason for going to this store was. All that I found funny happened when Sara and I walked through the middle section of the store, women's lingerie/athletic. A bunch of college girls were standing around talking about something only to stop and look at me as I passed by. I'm not joking at all and, yes, Sara took notice of this. It's weird to be hit on and stared at, not because I'm some kind of freak. Okay, I am sort of a freak with the large chest, etc. but to think I'm wanted so often.........Even funnier is how Sara used to hate having to deal with this, especially when it happens while she is with me, only to now love it.

Enough about my ego! On with the show! We've got clowns, homemade rootbeer, and soon there will be pictures put up. Don't say I don't do anything for you. I'm just open and crazy. It's not like you can beat me up or anything. Threats only make me laugh.

So, just how did I end up with something Sara will never ever let me forget? Apparently, I flirted with a gay guy in a used bookstore without realizing it. Sara and I were hanging around the comic book section to kill time since her roommate was still in pursuit of anything relative to nursing her geekiness. Behind this store's area is a used VHS area that contains all sorts of oldies but goodies, namely horror flicks that strike up my past moments of wondering why an axe is a useful tool for taking out frustrations on half-naked coeds.

I just couldn't help mentioning to this guy that was walking around with a Fright Night copy about how much I loved that movie when I was a kid. Sure, it's kind of corny now but, back then, that was the shit! "You're dead, Brewster!" was the infamous line said by Ed (I *think* that's what his name was) so, naturally, I said it. The guy's ears perked up and the next thing ya know we're talking about the various movies offered for sale.

Damn, the funniest thing was how goofy I acted when I came back to see what Sara was now doing. It was here that I told her how I made a new friend in her town all thanks to the power of horror movies. I'm sure I high-fived myself as I walked up and down the aisles because hardly anyone sees horror movies in the same fun as I do. Bored was I so I walked back to talk some more with my 'new friend.'

This is where it gets very funny. Sara and I waited in line to pay for something. My 'new friend' was behind her smiling at me. Oh, I smiled back and did all sorts of more things to show some sort of weirdness that is brought out in me when someone gets the things I love. Sara, meanwhile, is having the time of her life laughing at me because I do not realize that I'm, in a sense, flirting with a gay guy. I have no gaydar after thinking I have some from past events where I was able to pick out a gay guy from far away. Stick with me here. I suck at trying to explain this.

When Sara and I walked out of the bookstore, it was here that she straight up tells me that the guy I was talking so goofy-like to was gay. Naturally, I defended my lack of gaydar by saying, "No way!" All the 'new friend's' mannerisms suddenly played in my mind like a movie. Oh, gawd! Since when does a straight guy smile and wave at me like that? That kind of explains his purchase of the movie, Mac And Me, too. I was confused about that one as I stared at his selection of VHS tapes about to be bought.

I know for a fact that Sara will never let me forget this.

It was a long fucking weekend where much of Sunday was spent walking around at the town's Feast. It's nice and easy to navigate but I hate how so many people litter. The porta-potties were so bad that a little girl who just finished leaped out with her pants down and nose closed. This is one case where it is absolutely beautiful to have a cock that can be drained by simply pissing in the trough to the left. I didn't even close the door completely for fear of touching the handle.

As you know, The Feast is a re-enactment of the old days where men with muskets fought or traded with Indians. Food was cooked in a large pot over a fire and animal skins were used to keep warm in the winter. Hopefully, you paid attention to your history books because Ultrarooster is not here to teach you jackshit. I came to be entertained and see axes thrown by women in large dresses that need to be hiked up in order to walk.

Loved the Clockwork Clown comedy troupe. 1 guy, a slight comedian side that Sara found hot to look at, and his short female clown made up this neat little act. Fire breathing and comedy were good to me but it was the small female clown that I loved. Normally, I'm scared of clowns but she was so H-O-T to look at and showed good acting skills while being limber. I've got a lot of pictures of these 2, yessirree.

As for Saturday night, obviously before the Feast, it was spent in a haunted house put on by high schoolers. At $10 a ticket, I was skeptical but found it a lot of fun. For once, I got a teensy weensy bit scared when my fear of not knowing where I was came up as the group I was with had to navigate itself through a section filled with white paper-like products hanging from the ceiling. Never mind the killer babies, zombies, and the guy dressed as Jason from Friday the 13th. It was all about the possibility of being lost that got me a little freaked, so freaked that I had to place my hands on the shoulders of the girl in front of me as she did with the girl in front of her. To give you an idea as to how scary it got for some, 1 girl had to be taken out early due to not being able to go any further.

Basically, the haunted house went like this. You're placed in a holding cell with a small group, about 6 to 8 total. You're then led through a path where various scary things try to pop up out of nowhere. I'm bigger than high schoolers so I've got no issue with a kid trying to take a false shot at me. Sara, on the other hand, had a 'zombie' that kept telling her she smelled good. The parts I liked were the tilting walkway that made you feel like you were slowly going upside down. Way cool about how hard it was just to walk when your senses lost it so fast. Some of the house's designs were nicely put together and the ending was about getting through a maze of hay while people chased you with chainsaws. Good luck if you're female because those guys love the aroma of a scared cunt.

If you wish to know, Sara was behind me the whole time holding onto my shoulders. The issue was the strobe lights that may set off her epilepsy so moments were spent where she had her eyes closed. That tilting walkway was only possible for her by holding onto me. Gawd, I loved that thing and being made to feel like I was too drunk to stand up.

So, there you have it. A long weekend with a few more things to add later. This'll be my first night where I get to sleep in for some major healing. The sex on Sunday night wore me the fuck out as I had to get up early to drop her off at work and then drive home to work. This morning's doctor's appointment didn't make matters any better. Tonight, I get to recover. Knowing she had 6 orgasms made it worthwhile because a woman with a very relaxed pussy is easier to sleep next to. Happy twats all around.