Tit Bloggers Suck

"You don't wanna know."

-Hostel 2 (What 1 guys says to his brother when asked how he's going to torture the American girl waiting for him)

I'm close to done with Hostel 2, seeing as it is my latest flick to help calm me down after work's wear and tear on my body. Some people might find it strange that a horror movie does this. Trust me. Anything that can bring out a small form of adrenaline in me is a good thing after the work I do.

Alas, Eli Roth, Hostel 2's director forgot the one rule of a horror flick. While you might be able to get away with it when it comes to books, horror has the one main rule that you must actually care about the character. Well, what's the fucking point if you don't care that a moronic college student backpacking gets caught up in a kidnap Americans only to sell them to rich folks in order for them to release all their sick sadistic pleasures? The only reasoning would be to see how characters are killed off. Bah. I want to feel the need to cheer as a victim escapes, not laugh as the stuck up bitch gets a bandsaw to the face.

Did you ever read about that rich woman that used to bathe in the blood of virgins? I forgot what her name was but Hostel 2 has a scene where I actually got a bit grossed out. A sickle was taken to the throat of a victim while she was upside down. Oh, man! The woman bathed in a tub as the blood poured down. Again, I didn't feel sorry for the girl getting cut. Eli Roth, you can't blame Hostel 2's poor ticket sales on online thieves.

So, I'm about to be off to Indiana but with a small issue in need of being taken care of. There is a Halloween party. It's only now that I am informed of so it's possible that I might put Michael Vick's football jersey to some use. I'll take this $65 piece of apparel and pour some fake blood on it, buy a few stuffed dogs, and voila! I'm Michael Vick, bitch! This just might have to be definite because all the good costumes will be gone and I'm feeling creative.

Plus, I want to get rid of Michael Vick's jersey. Those that think dog fighting is a sport have no place in my closet even if they've found Jeezus.

Note: Jeezus is a tricky bastard to catch, though. Sometimes, I see him hiding behind the broccoli when I'm out grocery shopping only to reappear in the men's room tapping his foot. He aint ready for this sexy well-toned jelly of a white boy.

Is it any wonder why I love my fellow blogger, Summer? Sends me love on days I feel like shit.

So, I hope y'all understand that I've had a very long day and wish to unwind some more with Hostel 2. Time spent in Indiana will also recharge my batteries towards this blog because the past few days feel like it's a chore. Work was really draining even when Deaf Guy waved at me before taking off for the evening. Plus, some really rough sex just might help me with my mind's need for more creativity. It's tit for tat. Lose a lot of bodily fluids but end up smarter as you shout at the devil for more. Happy twats all around.